**Ryan Reynolds runs around being a submissive little bitch. A gorgeous submissive little bitch, but nevertheless.
**Sandra Bullock trolls around being abusive and aggressive.
Sandra Bullock: Where’s my coffee fool!
Ryan Reynolds: -Whimpering, gives her the coffee, along with his nutsack-
Sandra Bullock: Scum!! I have my own balls!! Go give yours to some other assertive female co-star who emasculates you!
Ryan Reynolds: Well, I’m not short on those!
Deportation officer: Sandra, I’m American, you’re Canadian, WTF are u doing in my country! Get out!
Sandra: Wait, I’m marrying Ryan, so you can't deport me! Ha!
Ryan Reynolds: What? No you’re not! You’re on some good shit!
Sandra Bullock: -squeezing Ryan's testicles- What was that?
Ryan Reynolds: Oh, yeah! Of course we're getting married! And we'll prove it by acting totally cold and awkward around each other!
**Sandra acts emotionally retarded, while Ryan acts convincingly loving by maintaining the facial expression of a lost, retarded puppy. A gorgeous lost, retarded puppy, but nevertheless
Ryan Reynolds: Let’s go visit my family!
Sandra Bullock: Oh hells to the n-
Deportation officer: -clears throat-
Sandra Bullock: -to the yes! I love my future hubbie! And his family! Golly!
**Sandra and Ryan go toAlaska , because Americans love Alaska
Ryan Reynolds' family: WTF? Who's this bitch?
Ryan Reynolds: My girlfriend! Gosh! Can't you tell how much I love her by the way I act totally ignorant of her presence?
Ryan Reynolds' family: k?
**They get onto a boat.
Sandra Bullock: But I can't swim!
Ryan Reynolds: Hence the boat! Gee, I hope you fall into the water later on in the movie, that way I get to grow a pair and rescue you!
Sandra Bullock: Me 2!
**Sandra emasculates Ryan in front of his entire family, and meets Ryan's ex who is cute, friendly and warm.
Sandra: Wow, isn't it strange that Ryan would end up with me, a cold heartless robot, when he has the option of being with you. I wonder if this dilemma will come in to play later in the movie!
Ryan's ex: you'd think that wouldn't you? But no, I actually don't influence the plot of this movie at all. I just can't get a decent job after “The Heartbreak Kid”
Sandra: Bummer! Well I'm off! I have babies to eat, and Jews to murder, later!
**Hilarious happenings take place, and Sandra Bullock unwillingly reveals her soft, vulnerable side
Sandra Bullock: My parents died when I was a kid! That’s why I’ve developed this bitchy exterior! But your family is so nice to me, that my cold soul has melted in their hands!
Ryan Reynolds: Golly Sandra! You do have a heart! With a little work you can be almost as pathetic as me!
**Sandra leaves Ryan at the alter, and boards a plane back toNew York
Ryan Reynolds: -running after plane- Noooooooooo!!!! I’ll never see her again!!!
Ryan Reynolds' family: WTF dude, just go toNew York
Ryan Reynolds: Oh, haha, duh!
**New York
Ryan Reynolds: I love you!!
Sandra Bullock: Umm... Although the events of this movie took place over 3 days, I’ll play along, I love you too
(Romantic music plays)
Ryan Reynolds: Marry me, because I'd like to date you...
(Music stops, sound of scratching record)
Sandra Bullock: What did you just say?
Ryan Reynolds: Marry me, because I’d like to date you?
Sandra Bullock: Wow, way to ruin a movie in one line. Seriously, who the hell came up with that? Ryan, you're an idiotic toss. A gorgeous idiotic toss, but nevertheless
**Sandra Bullock trolls around being abusive and aggressive.
Sandra Bullock: Where’s my coffee fool!
Ryan Reynolds: -Whimpering, gives her the coffee, along with his nutsack-
Sandra Bullock: Scum!! I have my own balls!! Go give yours to some other assertive female co-star who emasculates you!
Ryan Reynolds: Well, I’m not short on those!
Deportation officer: Sandra, I’m American, you’re Canadian, WTF are u doing in my country! Get out!
Sandra: Wait, I’m marrying Ryan, so you can't deport me! Ha!
Ryan Reynolds: What? No you’re not! You’re on some good shit!
Sandra Bullock: -squeezing Ryan's testicles- What was that?
Ryan Reynolds: Oh, yeah! Of course we're getting married! And we'll prove it by acting totally cold and awkward around each other!
**Sandra acts emotionally retarded, while Ryan acts convincingly loving by maintaining the facial expression of a lost, retarded puppy. A gorgeous lost, retarded puppy, but nevertheless
Ryan Reynolds: Let’s go visit my family!
Sandra Bullock: Oh hells to the n-
Deportation officer: -clears throat-
Sandra Bullock: -to the yes! I love my future hubbie! And his family! Golly!
**Sandra and Ryan go to
Ryan Reynolds' family: WTF? Who's this bitch?
Ryan Reynolds: My girlfriend! Gosh! Can't you tell how much I love her by the way I act totally ignorant of her presence?
Ryan Reynolds' family: k?
**They get onto a boat.
Sandra Bullock: But I can't swim!
Ryan Reynolds: Hence the boat! Gee, I hope you fall into the water later on in the movie, that way I get to grow a pair and rescue you!
Sandra Bullock: Me 2!
**Sandra emasculates Ryan in front of his entire family, and meets Ryan's ex who is cute, friendly and warm.
Sandra: Wow, isn't it strange that Ryan would end up with me, a cold heartless robot, when he has the option of being with you. I wonder if this dilemma will come in to play later in the movie!
Ryan's ex: you'd think that wouldn't you? But no, I actually don't influence the plot of this movie at all. I just can't get a decent job after “The Heartbreak Kid”
Sandra: Bummer! Well I'm off! I have babies to eat, and Jews to murder, later!
**Hilarious happenings take place, and Sandra Bullock unwillingly reveals her soft, vulnerable side
Sandra Bullock: My parents died when I was a kid! That’s why I’ve developed this bitchy exterior! But your family is so nice to me, that my cold soul has melted in their hands!
Ryan Reynolds: Golly Sandra! You do have a heart! With a little work you can be almost as pathetic as me!
**Sandra leaves Ryan at the alter, and boards a plane back to
Ryan Reynolds: -running after plane- Noooooooooo!!!! I’ll never see her again!!!
Ryan Reynolds' family: WTF dude, just go to
Ryan Reynolds: Oh, haha, duh!
**
Ryan Reynolds: I love you!!
Sandra Bullock: Umm... Although the events of this movie took place over 3 days, I’ll play along, I love you too
(Romantic music plays)
Ryan Reynolds: Marry me, because I'd like to date you...
(Music stops, sound of scratching record)
Sandra Bullock: What did you just say?
Ryan Reynolds: Marry me, because I’d like to date you?
Sandra Bullock: Wow, way to ruin a movie in one line. Seriously, who the hell came up with that? Ryan, you're an idiotic toss. A gorgeous idiotic toss, but nevertheless
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